20 Tips for a New Dad to Be the Best Husband in the World24.05.2022
Exhale. You became a dad. This happened. The most important male fear is overcome. Now you need to survive and it is desirable not to lose your team members along the way.
Be ready. And be strong. You’ll need the patience of a saint, the stamina of a triathlete, the composure the size of Kamchatka, and a sense of humor (most of the time) to get through this period and support your wife after the baby is born.
Read on the topic: How to find mutual understanding with your wife after the birth of a child .
We have collected advice from psychologists, experienced mothers and fathers and prepared a checklist of things that a novice dad can do to go through “fire, water and copper pipes” with his wife and become the man of her dreams:
- Try to find time to be alone . At least a few minutes a day when you can spend in silence, hugging each other. This can be tricky with a newborn, but will get easier as they get older.
- Talk to her about what’s on your mind. And let her say what she wanted. Learn to listen and understand each other together. You need to speak the same language . Ask how her day went. Be involved not only in words, but also in deeds. Give her some communication during the day: calls and texts will help her understand what you think of your family, even when you are far away from her.
- Cook her meals , for example, breakfast in the morning before leaving for work. Or take over the preparation of lunch and dinner: if you are not a great cook, ask your mother, mother-in-law or one of her friends for help. Make sure that the house always has the necessary products (containing protein, healthy fats, vegetables, herbs, fruits and nuts, if they are not contraindicated for the child). Take care of a supply of fresh water and snacks that can be eaten with one hand (sandwiches, chopped cheese).
- If she wakes up at night to feed the baby (at midnight, at 2 o’clock, at 4), take over the feeding of the baby at 6-7 in the morning to give her an extra half an hour of sleep. And let the morning be a special time that you and your baby spend only together. If you can’t help your wife in the morning, then feed the baby at night or bring it to your mother and then take it back to the crib (at least for one of the nightly feedings).
- Look after the baby in the evening so she has time to shower or bathe and take care of herself.
- Let her know you don’t mind the mess and help her clean up .
- Take your child for walks. Let mom have at least half an hour or an hour when she can sit in silence or sleep.
- Take the baby in your arms and calm him if he is crying, and the mother is upset, nervous or agitated. Otherwise, these emotions will be transferred to the baby.
- Help her bathe the baby and teach her to swim with the circle. It’s hard for a mom to do this.
- Bring her a glass of water when she is breastfeeding . Nothing will help get rid of fatigue, dehydration and constipation like water.
- Send her for a massage or do it yourself . This will help you avoid back problems (try carrying your baby all day long) and get in shape faster .
- Help her get a new wardrobe . What she wore during pregnancy no longer fits. In addition, shopping will help cheer you up.
- Encourage her to connect with other moms . They will give advice and provide moral support.
- Do not pressure her about sexual intimacy – the desire will gradually return when her body gets used to normal, and mom relaxes a little. The pressure will only make things worse. Give her more gentle hugs, strokes and kisses: this will not only boost your libido , but also strengthen your relationship.
- Let her be emotional . Accept it as a fact that sometimes she needs it.
- Be the one who puts the baby to bed every day. You’ll have to be creative – you don’t have breasts to silence a baby. You can choose a lullaby and play it on your baby while rocking or hum it. This will be YOUR song and YOUR ritual. You can read a special fairy tale (daddy’s) to the baby: your voice, calm, slow, will give your son or daughter the opportunity to relax and fall asleep.
- There is no reason why the person who gave birth to a baby should also wash and sterilize breast pump parts, bottles, jars, teethers and pacifiers . The Pope may well take over this matter.
- Follow what she needs . The house should always have a supply of necessary things (baby food, diapers, napkins, paper towels, baby care and hygiene products, etc.).
- Surprise her . Little courtesies like sushi she hasn’t eaten for almost a year, or a book she wanted to read, will be a sign of attention and a pleasant surprise for her.
- Celebrate with her . Celebrate every new day of your baby: his first smile, first erupted tooth, first word, first step… Do not forget that such inspiring moments are hidden behind a series of endless feedings, sleepless nights and fatigue.
And never forget to tell her that she is a wonderful woman and a wonderful mother. And how glad you are to be with her and your child. At least this way: